This week has been completely insane! I am SO tired. Eric has been gone to Armenia and London for a business trip and I have been entrenched in midterms and an upcoming ballet evaluation! RBE has been learning a new piece by Heather Gray and it is fabulous. I feel so lucky to be a part of it. I love working with different choreographers and seeing their ideas and being a part of their choreographic creation. I am excited for our Fall show. Mark your calendars! It is:
November 19th, 20th, and 21st. A Thursday, Friday, and Saturday. It will be a studio showing at UVU and will probably be around 7 pm each night. It's gonna be a good one!
Saturday, October 24, 2009
Saturday, October 3, 2009
BEWARE: disgusting toenail pictures!
So all of September 2009 was the month of toenail pain and frustration. It was a journey that I hope has ended and I will come to a time where dancing is pain free and fun again. Here are some pictures to show you what I have been going through. I have been in pain, felt frustrated, defeated, and have cried many tears because of not only the pain but the fact that I feel like I am weak because I can't push through the pain. There were days in my pointe classes that the pain was so much where I actually started to cry tears and tried to just hide in the corner. It definitely takes the FUN out of my dancing. There were other days where I thought the pain had finally ended to then realize that another round of pain was rolling in and I would be filled with dread.
1st Picture - I had bruised toenails that were incredibly painful from the pressure and I needed to poke a hole in the toenail to release the blood and water that was trapped under the toenail and causing so much pain. Usually people take a paper clip get it red hot and it pokes through the nail but the paper clip wasn't getting hot enough so Eric went and got his saudering iron that looks like a ball point pen and gets SUPER hot. It wasn't painful but it was pretty creepy, I simply started making a very small hole with the saudering iron until it melted right through the nail then I would hear a small "pop" and the watery solution would flow out easily. It really was a relief! Eric was freaking out though saying it smelt like flesh was burning. Come on! I am the one burning a whole in my foot! I just wanted to get it over with and relieve the pain and pressure!
I actually had to poke 3-4 holes in each big toe over a couple days to get all the fluid out. My toes were a bit sore but after a couple days and a lot of ibuprofen I was back to dancing on pointe and feeling pretty good!
Here are each of my toes, the picture doesn't do it justice. The toenail that looks blue was REALLY blue and the other one was looking really good after I poked a couple holes in it.
This picture is more recent, after releasing the fluid and being able to dance again, my big toenails started to really die. So sad. They also started to separate from the foot. I could wiggle my toenails off my foot like you would wiggle a tooth that was getting ready to come out. Finally after soaking my feet I was able to gently detach each toenail from my foot and this is what my big toenails look like now. Gross. They are a little tender but it was a lot more painful when they were coming off than right now! I got some new toe pads that should help the pressure when I dance on pointe so hopefully my toenails will grow back in a couple months and this issue will be a thing of the past!
May all your toenails be in good condition!
1st Picture - I had bruised toenails that were incredibly painful from the pressure and I needed to poke a hole in the toenail to release the blood and water that was trapped under the toenail and causing so much pain. Usually people take a paper clip get it red hot and it pokes through the nail but the paper clip wasn't getting hot enough so Eric went and got his saudering iron that looks like a ball point pen and gets SUPER hot. It wasn't painful but it was pretty creepy, I simply started making a very small hole with the saudering iron until it melted right through the nail then I would hear a small "pop" and the watery solution would flow out easily. It really was a relief! Eric was freaking out though saying it smelt like flesh was burning. Come on! I am the one burning a whole in my foot! I just wanted to get it over with and relieve the pain and pressure!
I actually had to poke 3-4 holes in each big toe over a couple days to get all the fluid out. My toes were a bit sore but after a couple days and a lot of ibuprofen I was back to dancing on pointe and feeling pretty good!
Here are each of my toes, the picture doesn't do it justice. The toenail that looks blue was REALLY blue and the other one was looking really good after I poked a couple holes in it.
This picture is more recent, after releasing the fluid and being able to dance again, my big toenails started to really die. So sad. They also started to separate from the foot. I could wiggle my toenails off my foot like you would wiggle a tooth that was getting ready to come out. Finally after soaking my feet I was able to gently detach each toenail from my foot and this is what my big toenails look like now. Gross. They are a little tender but it was a lot more painful when they were coming off than right now! I got some new toe pads that should help the pressure when I dance on pointe so hopefully my toenails will grow back in a couple months and this issue will be a thing of the past!
May all your toenails be in good condition!Wednesday, September 9, 2009
Endorphins
My toes were killing me today and I didn't have mandatory RBE practice so in my free time I decided to go running! It felt SO GOOD (my toes only hurt in pointe shoes)! I have not gone for a run in a couple weeks now and my body misses it a lot! I only ran 2 miles (I don't need to injure more things) and it felt amazing! I think I am still on a runner's high and it is 10pm. I wish I had more time to run more regularly during school but with all the dancing and homework it isn't at the top of my priority list, I do love how it makes my muscles long and lean though. :) I will be so grateful when my toes heal up and I can actually dance around in pointe shoes verses hobble around in them.
Wednesday, September 2, 2009
Torture Device
It is easy to smile when your feet don't hurt.
1st position!
It does look pretty but there is a price to pay. One thing to say about pointe shoes they are not for the faint of heart! These beautiful shoes have been causing me an unbelievable amount of pain this week! I have never known this kind of pain from dancing yet... I am in pointe shoes 3 hours a day on top of my non pointe classes 3-4 hours a day. Ouch. I thought to myself in RBE today "hmmm pointe shoes would be a great torture device!" The funny thing is as I was wobbling out of class to my car completely exhausted I felt so happy. I LOVE dancing my brains out and I LOVE that it is so demanding and difficult. I do hope the pain goes away but in the meantime I feel pretty hardcore:) What doesn't kill me (or my feet) only makes me stronger right???
Saturday, August 29, 2009
"I become what I imagine"
Yes I am a big fan of quotes and positive affirmations... and I 100% believe that if you want something bad enough you will make it happen! Last night I had auditions for UVU's ballet performing team Repertory Ballet Ensemble and I made it on the Company! I am pretty thrilled about this because it has been a goal I have been working on for a year! I was also officially accepted into the ballet program this summer after auditioning last Spring and I am now a Junior in the Ballet program at UVU!!! I am so excited! Compared to a few years ago I cannot believe HOW much I am loving my life right now! I have changed a lot in the last year, let me count the ways.
1. My confidence has increased so much as far as my dancing goes! Coming back to dance after a long break is really hard and it took awhile for me to really believe in myself again.
2. I have lost 17 pounds over the past year and I am in the BEST shape of my life! I am also a BIG advocate of running now and running 3-4 miles is no sweat to me. :)
3. I am on the Honor roll every semester and work really hard to get good grades. (I have been getting good grades for awhile now but hey I am proud of that!)
4. My petit allegro has improved so much! I think faster, move faster and it feels more effortless. A year ago my petit allegro looked like a mess.
5. I can do double pirouettes on pointe! Really it is amazing! I love the feeling and love that I believe in myself so much more now. I am getting to the point where I am not afraid to try the more challenging things and they seem exciting to me now.
6. I actually ENJOY auditioning! It is fun instead of stressful and exciting instead of terrifying.
7. My flexibility is so much better. I remember my dance teacher Shayla saying that if you keep working at your flexibility and extension it seems like it isn't improving but then one day you will realize that "hey my leg is way higher now!" and it is so true! On all of my extensions and splits I am surprised at how easy the flexibility is.
8. I have made a lot of great friends and me so many dancers and teachers who have inspired me to become not only a better dancer but a better person. It is so amazing and I am so lucky to have this experience!
1. My confidence has increased so much as far as my dancing goes! Coming back to dance after a long break is really hard and it took awhile for me to really believe in myself again.
2. I have lost 17 pounds over the past year and I am in the BEST shape of my life! I am also a BIG advocate of running now and running 3-4 miles is no sweat to me. :)
3. I am on the Honor roll every semester and work really hard to get good grades. (I have been getting good grades for awhile now but hey I am proud of that!)
4. My petit allegro has improved so much! I think faster, move faster and it feels more effortless. A year ago my petit allegro looked like a mess.
5. I can do double pirouettes on pointe! Really it is amazing! I love the feeling and love that I believe in myself so much more now. I am getting to the point where I am not afraid to try the more challenging things and they seem exciting to me now.
6. I actually ENJOY auditioning! It is fun instead of stressful and exciting instead of terrifying.
7. My flexibility is so much better. I remember my dance teacher Shayla saying that if you keep working at your flexibility and extension it seems like it isn't improving but then one day you will realize that "hey my leg is way higher now!" and it is so true! On all of my extensions and splits I am surprised at how easy the flexibility is.
8. I have made a lot of great friends and me so many dancers and teachers who have inspired me to become not only a better dancer but a better person. It is so amazing and I am so lucky to have this experience!
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
Dance Clips:)
Here are some clips of my ballet class and our end of the year performance. It was pretty casual but fun!
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